Hello Leadership? Meet The Sponge

How what we share - and how we share it - shapes our teams

My Father spent the better part of 30 years working for New York State, primarily with their Office of Mental Health. During his tenure, he and his colleagues worked for a Boss they nicknamed “The Sponge.”

They called him The Sponge because when he would go off to battle and barter with peers, or challenge and champion during the annual budget process, he would always come back and share the outcome, but rarely the play-by-play.

Why was this so important?

Because, unfortunately, all too often the higher up we go in an organization the higher the height of tension. Be it politics, pressure, or outright dysfunction, there is a lot that can take place at a leadership level while decisions are being made.

Whether it’s open discussions about reducing or eliminating a team, or candid conversations ripe with divisive and dissenting points of view from neighboring divisions, there is so much nascent information that can be downright dangerous to share with our teams, if we share it prematurely.

As leaders, it is our responsibility to soak up the totality of the situation, insulating and protecting our teams from unproductive information, and being clear in communicating the facts.

Becoming The Sponge

When my Father first told me about The Sponge, I’ll be honest, the story really landed. At the time, I was particularly close with my team, priding myself on having a candid, accessible relationship, built on the idea that complete transparency was a must.

But the story caused me to self reflect and question if that was truly always the best approach?

When I really sat back and thought about it, there were absolutely times that I overshared; where I leaned on my team more for emotional support than for information sharing; times when I found myself complaining - and perpetuating - politics, rather than giving the team what they needed to move forward.

I still believe in and embrace transparency, and when in doubt I still share a bit more than The Sponge did. That said, the story caused me to acknowledge that with leadership comes the responsibility of being astutely aware of what we share and how we share it.

The burdens we bear as leaders are ours. We can - and should - often share that burden, but we must do so intentionally and selectively.

Final Thoughts

So the next time you come back from a divisive leadership meeting, where barbs were thrown, ask yourself: What information should I share?

If you ask The Sponge, he’d probably tell you to share decisions, not division; to share facts, not feelings.

Now, when I come back from a particularly polarizing exchange, before I meet with my team, I will momentarily pause and reflect, asking myself this simple question:

Does the information I am about to share improve my team’s ability to effectively perform their job? Am I sharing this information for them, or for me?

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Editor’s Note:

This is the third newsletter from Kanahoma. If you like what you read, please feel free to like, comment, or share.

Sincerest thanks to all who have subscribed and shared so far. The response has been really great and personally quite rewarding.

Seth